2008 -The Roller Coaster Year

How do I even begin to put into words what this year has been like? It's been one large blur , a roller coaster ride that never seems to end.

Almost a year ago to the day the husband started the process of becoming self employed.... or as I call it taking that HUGE leap of faith into the unknown. This was something he's wanted to do for ages and now just seemed right for some reason. Many thought, and still do, think he was crazy for going out on his own at his age. He turns 50 in a few short month, the time in your life when your suppose to slow down and think about retiring. But not him, he sees a challenge and he jumps in with both feet and we of course all come along for the ride..... life jackets or not.

In January he signed a 18 month contract with a company in Arkansas, a full 488 miles from home. The days and weeks leading up to him leaving were spent getting him prepared for his "bachelor" life. Dishes-check, pots & pans-check, towels-check, toilet paper- check, check and re check. Our living room quickly filled up with boxes and crates that contained everything he would need and then some. He would stand there telling me he didn't need ALL of this stuff, which of course I knew better and he later admitted it too once he started using all of the " I don't need that" stuff.

Then the day came for him to leave......... or as I call it the day I went numb. I knew it was coming but I never put much thought to it since I was so busy getting him ready. He left and my world came crumbing down around me. I fully admit that I spent that day on the couch in tears, tears because this was it. This was how life was going to be like for the next 18 months. Could I do this? Could I keep myself together and this family together. I had to not only be the Mom but also the "Dad". I had to go to every school program by myself, I had to learn how to fix bikes, and all of the other stuff he always did. It's not like I didn't know how to do those things, I'm a only child who else was my Dad going to teach? But now all of those things he did fell onto me. And honestly it scared the crap out of me. I was so worried about forgetting to put the garbage out that I put a HUGE note where I would see it every day. I knew garbage day was on Mondays... it's been that way for years, but now I had to remember it.

After a few days of feeling sorry for myself I picked myself up and started making a plan of how I was going to do this. I should of known better because that very day I got a call from him..... I'm coming home because I'm leaving for Europe on Sunday. We knew this day was coming, that he would have to travel to Europe for awhile. We just didn't think it would happen so fast. I wasn't mentally prepared for it to say the least. It's one thing to have your husband 488 miles away, it's a whole other game when he's not even in the same country as you.

That's when I had my "mini melt down". I had gotten a e-mail from him, a e-mail he should of never sent and he has since apologised for over and over again. In his e-mail he says..... I'm lost and I'm using my computer to find my way. This is NOT something I needed or wanted to know. I sat in my room dazed with worry about him being lost in Europe. How could
I find him? Where would I even begin to look? My mind was filled with so much worry I made myself sick. Minutes seemed like hours, hours really did feel like days.He of course found his way and I course lived through all the stressed , but it's something I try to forget and NEVER want to go through again. After he got home the first "to do" item was buying him a GPS system and since having that getting around in Europe has been much easier.

In the months since his first trip he traveled back and forth to Europe once a month. Which made for some interesting ways to keep in touch. It's not like I could just pick up a phone and call him when I had a question, considering he was 7 hours ahead of us. So our days were filled with writing e-mails and waiting hours for replies.I spent many long nights listening to my computer waiting for the " you got mail" sound, hoping that it was him with a reply. His traveling did come with some up side too. Since he left out of Chicago , we got to see him for a few days before he left and he would always plan his trips so when he returned it would be his week home with us.

Another upside was in June I was able to travel to Europe and spend a week with him. I had flown by myself before, but this was the first time I would be traveling to another country by myself. I did quite well until I reached Germany, then well lets just say not being able to speak German or read German kind of made it hard to find my way through the airport. Add onto that the fact that I knew the husband was on the other side of the doors I needed to find....... I was just a tad excited to say the least. All of the stress was well worth it in the end though. After I got off the plane and found him we got in the car and drove 6 more hours ( I had already flown 8 hours ) to Venice, Italy. The sights we saw were breath taking! I will never be able to truly put it all into words. Every time I see a movie that has Venice in it I giggle, because I was there. I saw all of those amazing buildings, the Sea, the people, the PIZZA! After spending two days in Italy and taking in all that we could, we got back in the car and headed up to Salzburg, Austria. More amazing sites, visiting the childhood town of Mozart, the beautiful churches..... truly breath taking. After two days in Austria it was back into the car and onto Munich, Germany so we could be close to the airport. We didn't spend much time in Munich, since most of the day was spent trying to find a parking space. What we did see was beautiful and a must stop and see again if we ever are there again. We arrived back home the day before the Fourth of July and crazy me still had our annual party, which was just fine. I was still so giddy from our trip I think the whole house could of burned down and I wouldn't of cared.

In the months since then, life has settled down and the new "normal" has taken over out lives. M and K are both Jr's in high school. So hard to believe that they are both going to be SRS next year!. Where has the time gone? A is now a Freshmen and has adjusted to high school life. B- is now in 6Th grade and in the middle school. He adjusted well after the first few days. J- bird is in 5Th and doing well also. The husband is pretty much done with all the traveling and has settled into his own routine in Arkansas. He travel es home once a month for a week and pretty much lays around all day long..... which is fine by me I'm just happy to have him home so he can take out the garbage LOL

So that's pretty much our year in review. I'm not sure what the coming year will bring, but I know one thing for sure......... IF I CAN MAKE IT THROUGH THIS YEAR I KNOW I CAN MAKE IT THROUGH ANYTHING! Here's to a Happy 2009 !!!!!!